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Humorous Sayings And Quotes For A 50th Birthday

If someone in your life is turning 50, you should respond quickly to their birthday invitations with a funny 50 year birthday card and personal birthday messages. To stand out in their memory among the other 50th birthday jokes from friends and loved ones, here are some funny quotes and poems , to make them smile about making it over the hill.

Middle aged man and woman with his arm around her outdoors

Catchy 50th Birthday Sayings

  • The big 5-0 is finally here, I can’t believe it’s your 50th year! Considering the way that you appear, middle age isn’t so bad, my dear!
  • Happy 50th birthday, to a friend who’s really rare! I sent you this birthday card to show I really care.
  • Over the hill is what they used to say, to anyone celebrating a 50th birthday.  But look at you, you’re like a work of art! It’s hard to believe you hit the 50 year mark. Just keep your smile, spunk and style- because like a good car, you can’t be judged by the year but by the miles!
  • Because you’re turning 50 we thought it would be great, if we could invite you to a picnic by the lake. But we couldn’t all agree on a place and day to meet, so we decided a birthday card would be just as neat! Happy 50th birthday from your kids who love you a lot- you’ll be happy with a card because you probably thought we forgot.
  • I know you’ve been expecting 50th birthday gag gifts, jokes and a cake. Here at the office, we thought the whole thing was a mistake- surely you can’t be middle aged, for Pete’s sake! So we looked up your birth records, and after what we saw, we decided to buy you a cake after all!
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  • F is for how fabulous everyone thinks you are.
    I is for how interesting all your experiences have made you.
    F is also for the fun you bring into everyone’s lives.
    T is for how the tender way you show people that you care.
    Y is for just being you, the person that everyone adores.

Funny Birthday Quotes For Turning 50

  • To wish you a happy 50th birthday, the safest way to make your cake was with five “10” candles. We tried with 50 normal candles, and had to start over on the cake- also we had to put out a fire. Enjoy!
  • Your 50th birthday is where you can finally look at others turning 40 and tell them they ain’t seen nothin’ yet!Jack and Jill went up the hill and life was such a thrill- now we’re at the top, the cream of the crop looking down at the drop. Middle age isn’t the worst, that’s yet to come; so here’s a birthday cake, have some!
Fifty written in text on white background
  • Think of turning 50 as becoming a “vintage” item rather than being old- and the signs of years of drinking and smoking are “patina.” Happy 50th birthday, to my favorite Flea-Market Flip!
  • Turning 50 is kind of nifty
    When you consider the alternative.
    You’re not pushing daisies or feeding the worms,
    You still have a lot of life left to live.

    So make the most of your golden years,
    Take time to see the sights and travel.
    Better to roll down the highway now,
    While you’re above, not beneath, the gravel.

You take all the experience and judgment of men over fifty out of the world and there wouldn’t be enough left to run it.

Humorous 50th Birthday Sayings

  • It isn’t so bad that you’re turning 50 if you can get away with lying about it- so just avoid showing ID at all cost! Happy 50th birthday, and the drinks can always be on me.
  • If you want to feel better about your looks, tell strangers you’re 60 instead of 50 and they’ll tell you how great you look for your age. Also, I included a spa coupon with your card so you can look even younger!
  • Seeing as to how you’re turning 50, no one that knows you expects you to remember to send out birthday invitations- so don’t be surprised when we show up expecting a cake! Wishing you a happy 50th birthday, hope you make it chocolate.
  • Age 50: When your joints start reminding you how old you are, but your brain doesn’t want to believe it. Congrats on Exceeding your 50 year warranty!

50th Birthday Gag Gift Ideas For Him

Funny Quotes For Someone Turning 50

  • Now that you’re 50 and you’ve truly reached middle age, it must be hard to feel young. We can take you to the nursing home to make friends that you look like a school girl next to!
  • If you feel insecure about turning 50, think about it in dog years- your  Labrador must think you’re centuries old!
  • When a woman is turning 50, she’s worried about the strong chance that laughing and peeing will always happen together- so I’ll try not to surprise you with great 50th birthday gag gifts!
  • Shopping at age 50 usually involves bulk buying wrinkle cream at Costco- but being the trendy, youthful and resourceful lady we know, you get yours on Amazon!
  • Not all women have sophistication and poise by their 50th year, but you’ve been buying Poise incontinence pads for 10 years already! Happy 50th birthday, to my friend who’s ahead of the curve.
older husband and wife hugging and smiling

What To Say In A 50th Birthday Card

  • At the 50 year mark, your child-bearing years are behind you but your child-bearing hips have to stick around to carry your butt behind you!
  • Having hot flashes doesn’t mean that you’re not a hottie! Have fun turning 50 and setting the roof on fire.
  • You think you look to good to be turning 50, but if you wore your glasses when you looked in the mirror you would think differently!
  • Getting a birthday card at your age must be depressing, so just think of this as “birthday messages from yesteryear” and remember yourself as a spring chicken!
  • If your kids start with the 50th birthday jokes, surprise them with a day in your life at their age; no phones, WiFi or social media. That’ll scare the fun out of it for them!
  • You may be worried about turning 50, but take my word for it; you’re a better person now than you were at 30, so you’re only going to keep getting better with age! Happy birthday, to a friend that’s fine as wine.
  • So you’re turning 50 in the age of plastic, but you’re no candidate for a face-lift! Keep your chin up and your expectations as high as your heels, and stay a material girl for life.
  • Congratulations on turning 50. You’re almost a grown up! By the time you turn 100 you should be completely mature.
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  • You’re finally old enough to use the F-word, so hitch up your pants and shout it from the roof top: “I’m fifty!” Congrats on your ascension into middle age.
  • Birthday wishes are the least of your concerns when you’re turning 50. Most of your mail is from your doctor about your cholesterol, or AARP invitations or reverse mortgage ads- so I’ll understand if you don’t see this 50th birthday card before your big day. 

Funny Quotes For A Man Turning 50

  • Having been a firefighter in your youth should be helpful when your birthday candles cause a conflagration! Warm birthday wishes for your 50 year bonfire bash!
  • When you’re turning 50 it’s time to make the switch from Just for Men to Clairol, from boxers to briefs and from fried eggs and bacon to oatmeal. You’re still the same old fart to me- happy 50th birthday!
  • You’ve hit your 50 year milestone when your hairline looks in the mirror and moon walks away while you watch. Enjoy your birthday messages in style, like a smooth criminal!
  • When a man is turning 50 and he hears someone talk about “raising the dead,” he might think that they’re making a Viagra joke. But if it’s someone talking about you, they might be saying you look like a zombie, because middle age hit you like a plague!
  • Turning 50 is terrific… if you’re a bottle of Scotch. If you’re a guy with an expanding waistline and receding hairline, you’d better have that bottle as well!
Bald man laughing out loud

Card For 50th Birthday Saying

  • Congratulations on turning 50, and without being prescribed heart medicine yet. Happy 50th birthday from the bottom of my heart!
  • 50 may be the new 40, but it you could still pass for 60 so I won’t bring it up around strangers if you don’t. The 50th birthday jokes you get are all really compliments!
  • Your face has more wrinkles than an elephant’s backside, but elephant skin is very expensive to own!
  • I remember the 40th birthday card that I gave you poked fun at your age- if I had only known then how you would look at 50, I would’ve saved the insults for today! Happy birthday, and no hard feelings.
  • The good thing about someone noticing you have lipstick on your teeth is that they noticed you have teeth. Don’t let the 50 year milestone drag you down, when you have so much going for you.

Turning 50 means it’s only a matter of time before you’re regaling your grandkids with the details of your first colonoscopy.

Funny 50th Birthday Wishes For Her

  • Shopping when you’re turning 50 means buying your moisturizer by the case instead of by the jar. Happy birthday, and stay hydrated, smooth and refreshed!
  • When hair dye is essential rather than a luxury purchase, you’re entering middle age. Only the cashier needs to know, so you don’t have to show your 50th birthday card around!
  • That come hither look you get in your eyes just doesn’t look as enticing through your bifocals- but you take them off when you get in bed so it works for me! Happy 50th birthday, my cougar.
green background with white text for 50th birthday
  • Your once fabulous behind now looks more like a set of mud flaps- good thing your husband’s a trucker! Congrats on hitting your 50 year mile marker.
  • In the summer it won’t help, but in the winter your hot flashes will save you a ton on your heating bill! Happy 50th birthday, hot stuff.

You Know You're 50 When...

  • You finally understand that being over the hill beats falling down the other side.
  • You now have more hair growing out of your ears than on your head.
  • Your idea of getting lucky is being able to find your car in Walmart’s parking lot on the first try.
  • You have to sit down to tie your shoes because you can’t see your feet over your belly.
  • Your husband takes the garbage out more often than he takes you out.

Funny Birthday Quotes For Friends Turning 50

  • If your idea of a hot time is putting a heating pad on your bad back, you might be turning 50! Happy birthday to someone who’s starting their middle age years on fire.
  • Age 50 is when you start using those number 10 candles on your birthday cake because they take up less space.
  • A sign of turning 50 is when you go from thinking of “being regular” as meaning your period to meaning your bowel movements. The good news is, shopping for either occasion takes you to the same part of the store!
Blue background with lit candles for turning 50
  • Someone of your wisdom knows that sometimes separation is the best thing for a relationship; so losing all your teeth must not have been so bad! Happy 50th birthday, to the best whistler your age.
  • When getting high means you need to check your blood pressure, your party days are behind you! Celebrate your 50th birthday with all the youthful energy you can handle.

Over The Hill 50th Birthday Sayings

  • Over the hill and old and gray- you’re middle aged, starting today! When you turn a century old, this day in your life will be the centerfold.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Me. Me who- you mean you don’t remember your best friend? I know you’re turning 50, but it’s early for dementia!
  • What do you call a 50-year-old soldier guarding a building? Half a century! Best birthday wishes to a venerable veteran.
  • It’s easier to trust someone when they’re turning 50, because if they can’t remember your name then they definitely won’t remember your secrets! Happy 50th birthday.
  • Reaching middle age is more than just being “over the hill”- having your 50th birthday is to celebrate the climb!

Best Gifts For Someone Turning 50

Funny Quotes Poems Turning 50

  • Just because you’re turning 50 doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy that you’re alive, and run around and fave some fun pretending you’re only five. So have a blast and feel your best on your 50th birthday, because a body in motion stays that way!
  • When you’re turning fifty, it feels nifty to get deals to be more thrifty- senior discounts, early bird specials, AARP and free annual physicals. I hope that you enjoy a perk here and there, because you’ll lose the perkiness in your underwear!
  • I know that you’re turning 50 today, and you have lots of birthday messages coming your way. Among all of the 50th birthday jokes, mine should stand out- go look in the mirror and try not to pout. Just kidding, don’t be mad at your best friend; beauty is skin deep but you have great personality within!
  • Turning 5-0 is nothing to fear!
    But it mostly goes downhill from here.
    You’ll soak your teeth next to your bed
    You’ll thin out atop your head
    You’ll slow down and hate loud things.
    Your underarms will look like wings.
    But, you’ll never have to wait in line.
    You’ll even make a Tom Jones shrine!
    Happy 50th birthday, and hoping you make it to a centennial!
pin background with white text 50th birthday wishes

50th Birthday Poems Greeting Card Sayings

  • There once was a man turning 50, who spent his life being thrifty. He pinched every penny and pocketed every dime, he planned his expenses and saved receipts every time. Now he’s retiring with change to spare, on his 50th birthday with a bottle of whiskey to share!
  • It’s not very young and not very old- it’s the middle age as we’re told. Turning 50 can’t be that bad, you’re far from being a 100-year-old hag!
  • Your birthday invitations came as a surprise! I checked it three times before believing my eyes. To hear that you’re 50 blew my mind- I thought you were twice that all this time! Just kidding, please don’t be mad, of all your 50th birthday jokes that one isn’t too bad. 
  • 50th birthday poems might seem corny and out of style, but things like that seem cooler when you’ve been around awhile. Wearing bifocals, eating prunes and saying “back in my day” are the kinds of things you’ll start to do now that you’ve reached your middle age.
  • I bet you never thought year 50 would come, like a ghost of the future in a bad dream- but here you are, wearing suspenders and eating peaches with cream. To say that you’ve aged doesn’t do enough to explain the current scene; seeing you in bedroom slippers watching daytime court TV! Being middle aged isn’t the worst, there’s a few perks to say the least- it’s a lot easier to enjoy Jell-O when you already have no teeth!
White background with text about turning 50

Short 50th Birthday Sayings

  • You may think that you’ve reached old age, but stop and think again- 50 may be over the hill, but it isn’t your whole life down the drain. There’s still time, maybe twice as much; to have fun and explore, leave nothing untouched! When you’ve reached 100 years old, you’ll say that middle age was as great as you were told!
  • William Butler Yeats said, “From our birthday, until we die, Is but the winking of an eye.” So with that in mind, sleep with one eye open and enjoy every moment, because after turning 50 you won’t have half a wink left!
  • Now that you’re reading your 50th birthday card, you can relax because of all of the time you’ve worked hard. You’re wise enough to know that age is only a number, and there’s no sense in trying to look or be younger. So as you’re turning 50 and you eat your cake, don’t think about your weight or calorie intake!
  • “Old age and treachery will always beat youth and exuberance.”- David Mamet… So being a dirty old man should work to your advantage! Happy 50th birthday, from those who know you best.
  • “Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.”- Victor Hugo. Having said that, enjoy your newfound youth as you read funny 50th birthday quotes from your friends and family.


By the time we hit 50, we have learned our hardest lessons. We have found out that only a few things are really important. We have learned to take life seriously, but never ourselves.

Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.

Age 50! Now is the time to make your mark on the world-explore the Antarctic or become an astronaut. Make your mind up to take on exciting new challenges-straight after your afternoon nap

When you’re 50, every time you look in the mirror you think it must be April Fools Day.

50 years: here’s a time when you have to separate yourself from what other people expect of you, and do what you love. Because if you find yourself 50 years old and you aren’t doing what you love, then what’s the point?

No book is really worth reading at the age of ten which is not equally – and often far more – worth reading at the age of fifty and beyond.

The best form of birth control for people over 50: nudity.

The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down.

Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.

At 21 you’re finally free to slam down the throttle and see how fast you can go. At 30 you realize, hey, this thing has a brake pedal too. By 40, that brake pedal is showing some serious wear. At 50, let’s face it, you need a brake job.

Funny Quotes And Poems For Someone Turning 50